Yes, I am declaring it now. I will be posting every day for all of 2011.
I know I can do it because I have done it before. You know you want me to bring back my multiple personalities so you can wrap me in the virtual straitjacket and call me the Psycho Hose Beast again. That’s what I thought.
With the help of my cult leader, The DailyPost, and the community of other bloggers with similar goals my fellow Kool-Aid drinking bloggers, to help me along the way, I will be the follower I know I can be.
As always you should continue to support me with comments and likes, by pimping me via the social network of your choice, and through tightening and loosening of my straitjacket straps along the way.
Thirty days hath September, April, June, and November …
It is that time again. You know the one I am talking about … cults of insanity. No, I am not going to even attempt to do NaNoWriNo after my eight word masterpiece (otherwise known as The November 2009 Epic Fail) but I really need to get back into the groove of writing/blogging every day. When all else fails, there is always another freaking meme going around. This time it is a 30-day challenge that has been going around on all the kewl fuckers blogs. While I am usually not a follower, I am wearing my T-shirt for the next 30 days. Hopefully, this will not be bloggercide.
Here goes nothing something. The topic for day 1 is something you hate about yourself. Who did this? Really? Why can’t we start off with something easy like What did you do on summer vacation? Boo. Hiss. And Other Expletives. Eureka! That’s it! Believe it or not, I hate my casual and frequent use of profanity. It has been a lifelong struggle. Sybil smacked me in the mouth and washed it out with Lava soap more times than I can count. Like Hemingway said of his efforts in The Sun Also Rises, I have tried to reduce profanity, but I have to admit that I like its cathartic effect. I believe that honesty is always the best policy, and there are times that I aim to be abusive, blasphemous, and expressive. Simply put, profanity provides relief. I Read Banned Books is my outlet, sanctuary, and habitat for profanity … it always has been and always will be. Yes, I know I do not need to use profanity but there are times when I want to use it. Show some respect for my use of expletives, and remember that not only am I going to hell but I will be driving the bus.
Please note the absence of profanity in this post. Well, butter my buns and call me Biscuit!
THAT belief about yawns being contagious is totally true. As you may already know, I unconditionally love elephants, but just looking at this made me yawn.
AND THE OTHER: Well, what do you know? This post has to be the most random ever turned out to be my usual absofuckinglutely fabulous. I might make this a regular late-night-I-ought-to-post-something-before-bedtime-series.
Yes, I am an ally. Come out, come out, wherever you are.
Someday the open-minded will let love rule the world. Support love.
I have been a Lenny Kravitz fan from the moment I heard this song, and I have always associated it with supporting equality. Coincidentally, this song is always his answer when asked, “If God asked you to play a song for him, what one would it be?”
Oh, you probably don’t know who I am referring to in the title. Let me bring you up to speed.
In my last post, I proclaimed that I was going to dust off the treadmill and start running. Baby steps have to be taken because I have never been a runner in the truest sense of the word. However, I do love the idea of being a runner. I am also obsessed with my laptop and the internet lately. I know I need to disconnect once in a while, but it is so hard during the summer when I am tired and bored. It’s not only my stress reliever but also my primary source of entertainment.
After speaking with a consultant on Thursday, I decided to marry my two lovers rather than making excuses. Oh, yes, I am totally going to love my new relationship with T-Pain and Sweetmeat. (Yes, I chose T-Pain because beauty is painful. Sweetmeat has always been my laptop’s name even though I never declared it here on the blog.)
The only time you will catch me running is if something is chasing me.
Yeah, yeah. I have said both of those repeatedly in the past. However, I have a treadmill that is collecting dust sitting right in front of me, a fortieth birthday in six months and 13 days, and a love of wine and food. Yes, I am joining another cult of insanity. Everyone keeps telling me that running is a mental sport. Well, that’s just perfect because we all know that I am insane.
Holy Fuck-a-moly! I just stated that I am going to be a runner. The perfectionist in me says, “Now you have to do it, or you will be a failure.” The Psycho Hose Beast in me chimes in, “It’s cheaper than therapy.”
Now that I have the courage to start I need your help with naming my treadmill. You know that I name all of my electronics. I think the reason I haven’t been able to begin my running journey is I haven’t named the belted machine. Your vote may help to decide what my arch nemesis will be forever known as on I Read Banned Books.
C. O. L. B. E. R. T.
What are you waiting for? Rock the Vote, People.
Who knows? Maybe I will become one of those freaks with an I Big Read Puffy Heart Running sticker on Ruby’s bumper.
“Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in every day.” ~ Unknown
Yeah, I know that you haven’t got time to read this crap, but I am going to write it anyway. Shut it. I am trying desperately to believe the above quote for the last month, but it has been extremely challenging to have a positive mental attitude when so much crap piles up around me. With that said, I admit the following:
I have had changes in appetite and weight.
I have had changes in sleep patterns.
I suffer from restlessness and decreased activity that others notice.
I suffer from loss of energy and am feeling tired all the time.
I have had a hard time concentrating and making decisions.
I have feelings of worthlessness and guilt.
Yeah, I admit it. I suffer from anxiety and depression. I am medicated. It works … most days. I am working on finding my way.